The Singles' Rule

This one has been awhile in the making now ....... it's crafted itself out of experiences - in retail therapy, spa visits, eating out, dancing out, making out, just living actually . It's pretty much written itself from all the gawks, the stares, the open mouthed jaw dropping looks of astonishment and pretty much whatever facial expressions/ body language the world could throw as those of us who're called 'The Singles' as we go about on our retail therapy, spa visits, eating out, dancing out, making out and just living our lives - to the fullest .

Really - living it to the fullest...

1. When we say we're living our lives to the FULLEST, we REALLY MEAN IT : take it as a fact. And not as if we were trying to explain or justify or cover up in some way for being single. Because we really aren't - we're actually too busy enjoying our lives to the hilt to really try and cover up for a 'lack' that we don't even feel. Which brings us to-

2. We're single by choice - let's look at the logic on this one first. Given the population that this world has, do you really think most of us couldn't pair up / be paired up with if we'd wanted to??? The thing is, we're so busy with Point No. 1. above, we wouldn't want to just settle for anything that walks , talks and can 'rise to the occasion' on occasion. We'd want to give up being single only if we really think we've met someone we like enough to want to transition from all the 'singles fun' to all the 'paired up fun' (I'm sure that world exists too - seriously). We're willing to trade up - but not trade off.

3. We have friends and families - who care about us and who we care about deeply. We hang out with them all the time , except when we'd just like some alone time by ourselves. We're always in the thick of things social and familial, we love to go over to the extended clan's house every now and then for home cooked meals and family banter, we also spend time ripping apart/ defending (depending on where our mood's at) our best buddies to their home folks while eating home cooked food at their houses. Family time is not the exclusive domain of couples/ paired ups.

4. Our friends are a part of our lives - but our entire life doesn't revolve around them . And this one cuts both ways. Like all animals, we herd together - at parties and malls and brunches and movies etc... We love each other, we'll always be there for each other but - we have our own separate lives too. So the next time you look at one of us and think our choice of lifestyle has anything to do with wanting to be with our friends 24/7 - think again. Which brings me to -

5. We cherish our alone time - days spent lazing around the house doing nothing, jogging to music in the mornings, catching winter sunlight on the terrace with coffee and a good book - just being ourselves by ourselves. We simply love it. And when the socializing gets too much, we crave our alone time enough to spend entire weekends by ourselves as well as spending time on -

6. Vacations and eat outs and shopping sprees and watching movies - all of this doesn't necessarily have to be a shared experience all the time. We get hungry - and that doesn't mean we have to rely on takeout or cook our own meal - we're very well able and entitled to a table for one at the nearest pizzeria/fine dine. Repeat after me - Dining out is not the exclusive domain of pairs/groups, Vacationing is not the exclusive domain of pairs/groups, Retail Therapy works equally well when you're indulging in it all by yourself and watching a good movie by oneself doesn't mean we're losers who no-one wants to watch a movie with.

7. We're responsible adults - sure we date around, have impromptu sleepovers, get a li'l high and more than a li'l naughty every now and then but then the alarm clock rings and like everyone else who has a job, we hit the shower and get to work. We exchange glances and winks with random strangers at a bar - but only when we know we have solid backup to rely on in case the sitch gets too hot to handle. When the day's been rough, we catch up with the 'gang' over a drink or coffee (depending on what tomorrow's supposed to look like), we hook up with people we like and who like us back enough to hook up with us - but we keep our priorities straight and we play it safe. Translated - not all of us are junked up alcoholics having random sex with random strangers every night who then wake up by the roadside/ in said random strangers' beds and do the walk of shame...

8. We don't hate you or envy you or yearn for your way of life - sure, we get lonely sometimes but that doesn't make us want to give up what we have for the next best offer of couple-dom that comes along. As mentioned earlier, we won't just settle, when the time comes - we'll make an informed decision so that we don't look back and regret the transition from some of the best days of our lives to something not quite as exciting. We think our 'couple friends' rock - we're happy that they're happy and if not, we try and help them get there. Negativity of any kind is not an option - we're too busy living this life before we move on to another phase to envy/hate/yearn.

Those were the '8' that crafted themselves - readers are welcome to post more of their own.

This transient feeling

like life is just a fleeting memory made up of memories strung together with fine silken threads......as if there's so much that blurs upon focus and is thrown into sharp relief with a bird's eye view.......this transient feeling as if life itself is transient...........fleeting.........flowing along its own course........and I'm merely flowing along with it.......

I solemnly swear I'm neither drunk nor high ! Except maybe I drank enough of life and am high on it now ;-).

And I'm happy

I hate that cologne - but......for now, my hair positively reeks of it - and in this moment, I'm happy. :-)

Lazy Lazy Sunday

For once, I woke up feeling peaceful - not particularly rested though, mind you, since as always I'd slept only with the advent of dawn, but peaceful nevertheless. Maybe it's because I made my own dinner last night - after I don't know how many weekends worth (5 years maybe) of takeout, I finally ate a home cooked meal last night. Or maybe, it's the pensiveness that often accompanies reading anything by William Dalrymple - I finished his marvelous ' City of Djinns' for the second time last night. Predictably enough, I feel like trawling through Delhi's much touted though sadly neglected tourist spots - Qutab Minar, Red Fort, Lodhi Gardens, Humayun's Tomb et al.
But then I've always loved this about Delhi - scratch away the filth and grime and filter out the din of clamoring Punjabis and shrieking Jats and Gujjar - and at a turn and a step, you will see glimpses of a much refined age -  hear the tinkle of laughter and bells on a nautch girl's anklets, smell the sweet jasmine scent off a vine planted it seems aeons ago - or maybe even hear the clash of swords.  This city has seen birth and death and destruction and rebirth - this city is a phoenix - it rises from its ashes - vibrant and new - although, this time it may just have met its match in its current inhabitants. Amidst the hustle and bustle of gleaming glass fronted facades and the sound of mall rats scurrying away to wherever the next Dior or Gucci store opens, there are still, quiet times and a softness in the twilight. This is the City of my birth - it exasperates me to no end but at the end of it, its fascinating sense of the old and the arcane, its finely strung balance between the sacred and the profane (and both abound withing the warrens and recesses of the city), its secrets hidden out in the open, the esoteric right in the face for all to see - its heady bouquet of the long gone, the has been and the yet to come - yes I love Delhi.

Oh Me

I don't get this. I mean I really don't. Is this some sort of cosmic joke? I mean haven't we had enough of it by now???
I keep seeing things that I'm either not meant to see or that are not meant to be. And I don't understand why - if they're out of scope either way. If there's a particular lesson to be learned, I think I've got it by now - so STOP.
I have only so much patience left in me - and it's fast running out.

Takeoff

...so there's the earth and its gravity pulling at you like an anchor - and then there's metal and the mind of man....and then, the wheels leave the ground and I'm free...


Takeoffs are my favorite part of the flight :-)

Just arrived .......Just departed

Oh no....no one's died - yet. It's just how I feel - about a certain feeling. About feeling a feeling so transient that it seems to have died a rather sudden death and way premature at that ! But then so was its arrival - sudden and wayyyy premature :-). So now that I'm smart enough to understand that quick observatory based presumptions make for extremely shaky foundations ( now that I've been proven wrong on two counts - there goes the fabled inner antenna and intuition be damned!) - and given that dreams are but gossamer strings of candy floss fragility, the two do not go hand in hand together - I'd best dust off the last vestiges of this 'transient feeling' and run away as fast as I can.
But what I do want to hold on to is 'hope' - I met, I saw and I liked what I saw - and for a change, the liking was not born out of mere politeness nor was I being kind. I liked what I saw enough to feel like I felt - and boy! I haven't felt like this in a very long time - so I will now carry the hope that somewhere, all is not lost and that there does exist another being who can make me feel the way I yearn to feel again.
Enough with the ramble - I gotta go ......there's a whole life out there just waiting to be lived. And it's fun.

Shadowlands - Yearning

'In the shadow-lands
When lines are blurred
And my dreams are yours – for an infinite heartbeat'




In the silhouette of the morn
As the lark croons it's sweetest song

I watch you fade into the night
With the advent of every dawn

Across the bridge that burns with light
My yearning takes to solitary flight
I long for chasms to be bridged anew
With the advent of another night

Of neither light nor dark I know
Nor heed the seer’s tidings of woe
My every thought yet calls for you
And chafes at time’s passage slow

Then shadows fall and you walk my way
And though I know you cannot stay

Yet hope still springs eternal deep
And holds us in its enchanting sway


We meet through thundered mist and rain
And renewed joy yet dulls the pain
In the shadow-lands we tread

Love’s labor lost – our dreams in vain

Shadowlands

'In the shadowlands
 Where lines blur
 Where do you end .....where do I begin'

In the shadow of the night
When darkness veils our heart's delight
In the shadowlands we tread
When yearning bridges our great divide

I hear your voice as you call my name
Through thunder mist and shadowed rain
I cleave to you I know not why
For yonder lies little joy and much pain

Yet in this moment I am lost
No matter ill fortune's weary cost
My only anchor a rootless bond
And sibilant whispers from the haunting past

In shadowland's temptuous wanton dark
Beyond the morn-song of the lark
Where do you end - where do I start
When blurs the line, the divisive mark

By word and look I perish here
I heed your call and know no fear
Until yet dawns the daily light
And throws in stark relief - our reality clear.

Welcome 2011

...and it's freakishly cold out so all bets are off...departing with the usual tradition of 'what I do today continues throughout the year', I'm stayin' in - and not getting unduly worried over not getting to the gym, going grocery shopping, hanging out - whatever! As of now, I'm 3 blankets down, watching The Sing Off Season 2 reruns and getting to a really really good place with all that music ;-). Monday, I start a new year at work - one that will be challenging and crazy - but for now, it's a cold wintry Saturday 11.30, there's a bit of sun and a whole day to look forward to. Hello 2011 - try not to rain so much (on my parade or otherwise) :-)